One thing was certain, that the white kitten had had
nothing to do with it:--it was the black kitten's fault entirely.
For the white kitten had been having its face washed by the old cat
for the last quarter of an hour (and bearing it pretty well,
considering); so you see that it couldn't have had any hand in the
mischief.
The way Dinah washed her children's faces was this: first she
held the poor thing down by its ear with one paw, and then with the
other paw she rubbed its face all over, the wrong way, beginning at
the nose: and just now, as I said, she was hard at work on the
white kitten, which was lying quite still and trying to purr--no
doubt feeling that it was all meant for its good.
But the black kitten had been finished with earlier in the
afternoon, and so, while Alice was sitting curled up in a corner of
the great armchair, half talking to herself and half asleep, the
kitten had been having a grand game of romps with the ball of
worsted Alice had been trying to wind up, and had been rolling it
up and down till it had all come undone again; and there it was,
spread over the hearth-rug, all knots and tangles, with the kitten
running after its own tail in the middle.
"Oh, you wicked wicked little thing!" cried Alice, catching up
the kitten, and giving it a little kiss to make it understand that
it was in disgrace. "Really, Dinah ought to have taught you better
manners! You ought, Dinah, you know you ought!" she added, looking
reproachfully at the old cat, and speaking in as cross a voice as
she could manage--and then she scrambled back into the arm-chair,
taking the kitten and the worsted with her, and began winding up
the ball again. But she didn't get on very fast, as she was talking
all the time, sometimes to the kitten, and sometimes to herself.
Kitty sat very demurely on her knee, pretending to watch the
progress of the winding, and now and then putting out one paw and
gently touching the ball, as if it would be glad to help if it
might.
"Do you know what to-morrow is, Kitty?" Alice began. "You'd have
guessed if you'd been up in the window with me--only Dinah was
making you tidy, so you couldn't. I was watching the boys getting
in sticks for the bonfire--and it wants plenty of sticks, Kitty!
Only it got so cold, and it snowed so, they had to leave off. Never
mind, Kitty, we'll go and see the bonfire to-morrow." Here Alice
wound two or three turns of the worsted round the kitten's neck,
just to see how it would look: this led to a scramble, in which the
ball rolled down upon the floor, and yards and yards of it got
unwound again.
"Do you know, I was so angry, Kitty," Alice went on, as soon as
they were comfortably settled again, " when I saw all the mischief
you had been doing, I was very nearly opening the window, and
putting you out into the snow! And you'd have deserved it, you
little mischievous darling! What have you got to say for yourself?
Now don't interrupt me!" she went on, holding up one finger. "I'm
going to tell you all your faults. Number one: you squeaked twice
while Dinah was washing your face this morning. Now you can't deny
it, Kitty: I heard you! What's that you say?" (pretending that the
kitten was speaking.) "Her paw went into your eye? Well, that's
your fault, for keeping your eyes open-if you'd shut them tight up,
it wouldn't have happened. Now don't make any more excuses, but
listen! Number two: you pulled Snowdrop away by the tail just as I
had put down the saucer of milk before her! What, you were thirsty,
were you? How do you know she wasn't thirsty too? Now for number
three: you unwound every bit of the worsted while I wasn't
looking!
"That's three faults, Kitty, and you've not been punished for
any of them yet. You know I'm saving up all your punishments for
Wednesday week
--Suppose they had saved up all my punishments!" she
went on, talking more to herself than the kitten. "What would they
do at the end of a year? I should be sent to prison, I suppose,
when the day came. Or--let me see--suppose each punishment was to
be going without a dinner: then, when the miserable day came, I
should have to go without fifty dinners at once! Well, I shouldn't
mind that much! I'd far rather go without them than eat them!
"Do you hear the snow against the windowpanes, Kitty? How nice
and soft it sounds! Just as if some one was kissing the window all
over outside. I wonder if the snow loves the trees and fields, that
it kisses them so gently? And then it covers them up snug, you
know, with a white quilt; and perhaps it says, 'Go to sleep,
darlings, till the summer comes again.' And when they wake up in
the summer, Kitty, they dress themselves all in green, and dance
about--whenever the wind blows--oh, that's very pretty!" cried
Alice, dropping the ball of worsted to clap her hands. "And I do so
wish it was true! I'm sure the woods look sleepy in the autumn,
when the leaves are getting brown.
"Kitty, can you play chess? Now, don't smile, my dear, I'm
asking it seriously. Because, when we were playing just now, you
watched just as if you understood it: and when I said 'Check!' you
purred! Well, it was a nice check, Kitty, and really I might have
won, if it hadn't been for that nasty Knight, that came wriggling
down among my pieces. Kitty, dear, let's pretend--" And here I wish
I could tell you half the things Alice used to say, beginning with
her favourite phrase "Let's pretend." She had had quite a long
argument with her sister only the day before-all because Alice had
begun with "Let's pretend we're kings and queens:" and her sister,
who liked being very exact, had argued that they couldn't, because
there were only two of them, and Alice had been reduced at last to
say, "Well, you can be one of them then, and I'll be all the rest."
And once she had really frightened her old nurse by shouting
suddenly in her ear, "Nurse! Do let's pretend that I'm a hungry
hy?na, and you're a bone!"
But this is taking us away from Alice's speech to the kitten.
"Let's pretend that you're the Red Queen, Kitty! Do you know, I
think if you sat up and folded your arms, you'd look exactly like
her. Now do try, there's a dear!" And Alice got the Red Queen off
the table, and set it up before the kitten as a model for it to
imitate: however, the thing didn't succeed, principally, Alice
said, because the kitten wouldn't fold its arms properly. So, to
punish it, she held it up to the Looking-glass, that it might see
how sulky it was--"and if you're not good directly," she added,
"I'll put you through into Looking-glass House. How would you like
that?
"Now, if you'll only attend, Kitty, and not talk so much, I'll
tell you all my ideas about Looking-glass House. First, there's the
room you can see through the glass--that's just the same as our
drawing-room, only the things go the other way. I can see all of it
when I get upon a chair--all but the bit just behind the fireplace.
Oh! I do so wish I could see that bit! I want so much to know
whether they've a fire in the winter: you never can tell, you know,
unless our fire smokes, and then smoke comes up in that room
too--but that may be only pretence, just to make it look as if they
had a fire. Well then, the books are something like our books, only
the words go the wrong way; I know that, because I've held up one
of our books to the glass, and then they hold up one in the other
room.
"How would you like to live in Looking-glass House, Kitty? I
wonder if they'd give you milk in there? Perhaps Looking-glass milk
isn't good to drink-But oh, Kitty! now we come to the passage. You
can just see a little peep of the passage in Looking-glass House,
if you leave the door of our drawing-room wide open: and it's very
like our passage as far as you can see, only you know it may be
quite different on beyond. Oh, Kitty! how nice it would be if we
could only get through into Looking-glass House! I'm sure it's got,
oh! such beautiful things in it! Let's pretend there's a way of
getting through into it, somehow, Kitty. Let's pretend the glass
has got all soft like gauze, so that we can get through. Why, it's
turning into a sort of mist now, I declare! It'll be easy enough to
get through--" She was up on the chimney-piece while she said this,
though she hardly knew how she had got there. And certainly the
glass was beginning to melt away, just like a bright silvery
mist.
In another moment Alice was through the glass, and had jumped
lightly down into the Looking-glass room. The very first thing she
did was to look whether there was a fire in the fireplace, and she
was quite pleased to find that there was a real one, blazing away
as brightly as the one she had left behind. "So I shall be as warm
here as I was in the old room," thought Alice: "warmer, in fact,
because there'll be no one here to scold me away from the fire. Oh,
what fun it'll be, when they see me through the glass in here, and
can't get at me!"
Then she began looking about, and noticed that what could be
seen from the old room was quite common and uninteresting, but that
all the rest was as different as possible. For instance, the
pictures on the wall next the fire seemed to be all alive, and the
very clock on the chimney-piece (you know you can only see the back
of it in the Looking-glass) had got the face of a little old man,
and grinned at her.
"They don't keep this room so tidy as the other," Alice thought
to herself, as she noticed several of the chessmen down in the
hearth among the cinders: but in another moment, with a little
"Oh!" of surprise, she was down on her hands and knees watching
them. The chessmen were walking about, two and two!
"Here are the Red King and the Red Queen," Alice said (in a
whisper, for fear of frightening them), "and there are the White
King and the White Queen sitting on the edge of the shovel
--and here are two Castles walking arm in arm--I don't
think they can hear me," she went on, as she put her head closer
down, "and I'm nearly sure they can't see me. I feel somehow as if
I were invisible
--"
Here something began squeaking on the table behind Alice, and
made her turn her head just in time to see one of the White Pawns
roll over and begin kicking: she watched it with great curiosity to
see what would happen next.
"It is the voice of my child!" the White Queen cried out, as she
rushed past the King, so violently that she knocked him over among
the cinders. "My precious Lily! My imperial kitten!" and she began
scrambling wildly up the side of the fender.
"Imperial fiddlestick!" said the King, rubbing his nose, which
had been hurt by the fall. He had a right to be a little annoyed
with the Queen, for he was covered with ashes from head to
foot.
Alice was very anxious to be of use, and, as the poor little
Lily was nearly screaming herself into a fit, she hastily picked up
the Queen and set her on the table by the side of her noisy little
daughter.
The Queen gasped, and sat down: the rapid journey through the
air had quite taken away her breath, and for a minute or two she
could do nothing but hug the little Lily in silence. As soon as she
had recovered her breath a little, she called out to the White
King, who was sitting sulkily among the ashes, "Mind the
volcano!"
"What volcano?" said the King, looking up anxiously into the
fire, as if he thought that was the most likely place to find
one.
"Blew--me--up," panted the Queen, who was still a little out of
breath. "Mind you come up--the regular way--don't get blown
up!"
Alice watched the White King as he slowly struggled up from bar
to bar, till at last she said, "Why, you'll be hours and hours
getting to the table, at that rate. I'd far better help you, hadn't
I?" But the King took no notice of the question: it was quite clear
that he could neither hear her nor see her.
So Alice picked him up very gently, and lifted him across more
slowly than she had lifted the Queen, that she mightn't take his
breath away: but, before she put him on the table, she thought she
might as well dust him a little, he was so covered with ashes.
She said afterwards that she had never seen in all her life such
a face as the King made, when he found himself held in the air by
an invisible hand, and being dusted: he was far too much astonished
to cry out, but his eyes and his mouth went on getting larger and
larger, and rounder and rounder, till her hand shook so with
laughing that she nearly let him drop upon the floor.
"Oh! please don't make such faces, my dear!" she cried out,
quite forgetting that the King couldn't hear her. "You make me
laugh so that I can hardly hold you! And don't keep your mouth so
wide open! All the ashes will get into it
--there, now I think you're tidy enough!" she added,
as she smoothed his hair, and set him upon the table near the
Queen.
The King immediately fell flat on his back, and lay perfectly
still: and Alice was a little alarmed at what she had done, and
went round the room to see if she could find any water to throw
over him. However, she could find nothing but a bottle of ink, and
when she got back with it she found he had recovered, and he and
the Queen were talking together in a frightened whisper--so low,
that Alice could hardly hear what they said.
The King was saying, "I assure you, my dear, I turned cold to
the very ends of my whiskers!"
To which the Queen replied, "You haven't got any whiskers."
"The horror of that moment," the King went on, "I shall never,
never forget!"
"You will, though," the Queen said, "if you don't make a
memorandum of it."
Alice looked on with great interest as the King took an enormous
memorandum-book out of his pocket, and began writing. A sudden
thought struck her, and she took hold of the end of the pencil,
which came some way over his shoulder, and began writing for
him.
The poor King looked puzzled and unhappy, and struggled with the
pencil for some time without saying anything; but Alice was too
strong for him, and at last he panted out, "My dear! I really must
get a thinner pencil. I can't manage this one a bit; it writes all
manner of things that I don't intend--"
"What manner of things?" said the Queen, looking over the book
(in which Alice had put 'The White Knight is sliding down the
poker. He balances very badly'). "That's not a memorandum of your
feelings!"
There was a book lying near Alice on the table, and while she
sat watching the White King (for she was still a little anxious
about him, and had the ink all ready to throw over him, in case he
fainted again), she turned over the leaves, to find some part that
she could read, "-for it's all in some language I don't know," she
said to herself.
It was like this.
.YKCOWREBBAJ
sevot yhtils eht dna ,gillirb sawT'
;edaw eht ni elbmig dna eryg diD
,sevogorob eht erew ysmim llA
.ebargtuo shtar emom eht dnA
She puzzled over this for some time, but at last a bright
thought struck her. "Why, it's a Looking-glass book, of course! And
if I hold it up to a glass, the words will all go the right way
again."
This was the poem that Alice read.
JABBERWOCKY.
'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the
wade;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.
Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!"
He took his vorpal sword in hand:
Long time the manxome foe he sought-
So rested he by the Tumtum tree,
And stood awhile in thought.
And as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood.
And burbled as it came!
One, two! One, two! And through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back.
"And hast thou slain the Jabberwock?
Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!"
He chortled in his joy.'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.
"It seems very pretty," she said when she had finished it, "but
it's rather hard to understand!" (You see she didn't like to
confess, even to herself, that she couldn't make it out at all.)
"Somehow it seems to fill my head with ideas
--only I don't exactly know what they are! However,
somebody killed something: that's clear, at any rate--"
"But oh!" thought Alice, suddenly jumping up, "if I don't make
haste I shall have to go back through the Looking-glass, before
I've seen what the rest of the house is like! Let's have a look at
the garden first!" She was out of the room in a moment, and ran
down stairs--or, at least, it wasn't exactly running, but a new
invention for getting down stairs quickly and easily, as Alice said
to herself. She just kept the tips of her fingers on the hand-rail,
and floated gently down without even touching the stairs with her
feet; then she floated on through the hall, and would have gone
straight out at the door in the same way, if she hadn't caught hold
of the door-post. She was getting a little giddy with so much
floating in the air, and was rather glad to find herself walking
again in the natural way.